Celestial Seasonings

I WOKE UP LIKE THIS

50 years ago I drank some Sleepytime Tea and it really worked because I literally just woke up. Scroll down to see all the things I’m trying to catch up on after five decades of peaceful snoozing.

I’m not mad I missed this decade and what it would’ve done to my digestive system.

Luckily there’s Black Tea with Probiotics now. To anyone who ever had to eat a jello mold with meat in it: I feel terrible for you.

From what I can tell, the 80s were mostly about bad guys with blonde hair driving convertibles and movies about high schoolers... does this check out?

I mean, there were lots of highs so I’m just glad we have Tension Tamer Tea to calm us down now.

You know what’s great about the 90s? The way they were a long time ago but also yesterday. Haha ha ha.

Remember when everyone freaked out about Y2K? Lol, I don’t but it sounds intense. Glad I have this Energy Green Tea to help me keep up. Also, can we bring back butterfly clips?

The 00s were kind of awkward. Do you say “the aughts” or “the o-os” or just call it “the velour jumpsuit decade”?

Fortunately I won’t lose sleep over it because now I have this Sleepytime Tea. But I will say that I would’ve been an incredible non-singing member of a less popular boy band.

It’s hard to be nostalgic for the 2010s because they literally just happened but I read that on the internet after doing my own research so TBD if that’s even true.

But you know what’s great? I have this TeaWell Daily Wellness Tea that’s going to cure all my problems*.

*TeaWell Daily Wellness Tea will not cure all your problems. This is an exaggeration from a cartoon bear.

After Sleeping through the last 50 years, I have A Lot to catch up on.

So, if you need me I'll be here, living in a computer that lives in your pocket, drinking my tea and saying "no worries!" way too much.